"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." - Psalm 139:13-16 (NIV)

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Ok, I haven't posted in forever.......since February I believe. But once again, it certainly isn't because there wasn't anything to post about.  Today of all days..........is definitely one when I had one of those........"I must blog" moments. Today, my little guy had to go for a follow up visit to the doctor, not to his occupational therapist or the doctor for his hand, but to his allergy/asthma specialist. Just me and my buddy......(the one on one conversations with this kid are truly amazing.) We had to make a stop at his primary care pediatricians office to get immunization records for kindergarten enrollment. While sitting in the office, waiting on the documentation......he says, "momma, why do I have one big and and one small hand?" Caught completely off guard, I responded with....."What was that buddy?" So, he softly asks the question again. I'm thinking....Lord, how do I explain this to my baby.....God made you special, suddenly isn't enough explanation I guess. My answer was...."well buddy, when you were in mommy's tummy, your hand stop growing." He says, "will it get big like my other hand?" It hurt for me to tell him because I didn't know how he would react, but I said, "No, it won't buddy....it will stay smaller than your other hand." He then goes further to say....."What's that thing that you can put on here to make it look like a hand?" And he motioned as if he was connecting something to his hand. I said, "Do you mean a prosthetic hand?" He says, "Yes." I then asked if he wants to get a prosthetic hand........he said, "No"........I replied, "Ok, buddy." Then I asked if he likes his small hand......He very matter-of-factly said "Yes, I can dribble a basketball with it." ....."You sure can, and that is soooooo cool!"  Now as heart wrenching as this conversation was and just when I thought to myself how much I absolutely LOVE this child and THANK YOU GOD for blessing me with this kid AND for helping me through this little chat.........it wasn't over yet. He went on to say......"momma, why am I the only one in our family that is sick?"  Wow..........at this point he's talking about his asthma and allergy trouble. He never once asked why he was the only one with one small hand..........but he did want to know why he was the only one in our family that has asthma and allergy trouble. I was able to tell him that mommy also has allergies and so does daddy.That was enough for now. I'm really grateful for how this conversation flowed smoothly and how my son didn't get disheartened. I'm praying for the words to explain why he is the only one in our family with one small hand.........I hope God guides me through it, just like HE did today. We later went to work out at the YMCA and why shooting basketball in the gym, I noticed a kid asking my little guy about his hand........I heard him say, "I was born this way." and the kid........who was slightly older said. "Oh." And somehow..........that was enough. My buddy looked at me with the biggest smile on his face and I gave him a thumbs up and the biggest smile I could muster........I'm so incredibly proud of him.

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